Is Instagram Ruining Your Relationship Without You Realising It? Here’s What Experts Want You to Know

1. You are Comparing Real Life to a Highlight Reel

The dissatisfaction that you feel after reading romantic posts? It is not unusual, as some may think. Instagram reveals the most perfected side of relations. People post on it about vacations, anniversaries, and big gestures. But it is often not the full picture, as nobody is posting about their fights, conflicts, and distance. Those are not the scenes where you can see the boringness, tension, or unresolved conflicts behind.

Seeing how your daily life and reality compare to the highlight reel that your peers are posting can make you feel as though you are missing out. “It is the risk of forgetting that you should remember that this is a show, not a representation of daily love,” says Dr Barmi.

2. Romantic Posts Can Intensify Conflicts

Social media may become particularly triggering when you are going through a bad spell in your relationship. It hurts to see couples posting love notes or romantic dinners when your partner feels distant or hurt in the first place. “It reminds you of what you believe you are lacking in your relationship,” explained Dr Barmi.

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3. Instagram is not Intimacy

A lot of couples these days have the tendency to confuse love with social recognition.

But this is what real intimacy is:

• Open and inclusive discussion when things get rough.
• Emotional support during the unspoken problems
• Acts of service or even listening without judgment, especially on the bad days

“These are what nobody is putting up”, Dr Barmi said. Hence, assuming that your love is not pretty enough to be posted on Instagram is a positive sign because it is, therefore, based on what is real rather than on what is beautiful.

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4. Set Clear Social Media Boundaries

Do not allow Instagram to dictate anything to you as a couple, but make your own rules. According to Dr Barmi, communication regarding the perceptions of social media by each partner should be discussed without any restrictions, and the aspects of what feels respectful should be discussed as well.

The following are some of the areas of concern that should be discussed:

• Privacy vs. posting: What can I post that is appropriate? What must be avoided?
• No phone zones: Digital detox zones include meal-time, dating nights, and bed.
• Communication with others: Clarify what seems right when dealing with other individuals on the internet, particularly exes or flirting (even unconsciously).
• Shoutouts and tagging: Learn if it matters to both of you that you be publicly recognised? Be aware of the expectations of one another.

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Final Thoughts: Think Beyond Instagram

It is not Instagram that is the issue; it is unconscious use. With proper intentions and boundaries towards social media, couples can create a happy and healthy relationship. According to Dr Barmi, “Love flourishes in places where it is cultivated as opposed to where it is acted out.” That is why the next time you find yourself comparing your relationships to the flawlessly lit image on your feed, take a step back. That image is not the whole picture. Your relationship as it is with its blemishes, quiet, and changing beauty might be the best thing that happened to you.