What Is Menodivorce? The Midlife Marital Crisis Triggered By Menopause

Every relationship is like a rollercoaster ride – with its own ups and downs. We have often heard how one person’s extreme mood swings has the ability to impact their romantic relationship negatively. And such mood changes are common in women’s life during their periods, as well as menopause. During these times, emotions run high. This often weighs heavily on their love life. Did you know that during menopause, many people tend to end their marriage? This even has a term. It is called menodivorce. Sounds intriguing, isn’t it?

Well, menodivorce is basically divorce that occurs during or as a result of a woman’s menopause. Many individuals, experiencing perimenopause or menopause, start to question their lives, as well as their intimate relationships. This may sometimes lead to divorce — and hence the term menodivorce.

To get an expert view on this midlife marital crisis triggered by menopause, we reached out to our expert – Mr S Giriprasad, Psychologist, Aster Whitefield Hospital, Bengaluru. Read ahead.

Can Menopause Impact Your Marriage?

Now that we know what the trend menodivorce is about, it is time to verify from our expert whether menopause can actually harm your marriage or not. “Menopause can very well negatively influence relationships. It is the time where a female body goes through some pretty major hormonal changes, which inevitably affects the physical and emotional side of the person as well,” shares Mr Giriprasad.

He adds, “Low estrogen levels can cause mood swings, irritability, tiredness, anxiety, a lack of desire, vaginal dryness, and sleep problems, among other things. If these changes are not recognised and accepted, partners may see them as a kind of emotional disengagement and even a lack of love in the relationship. A distance, anger, and silence between spouses may very well evolve out of this misunderstanding gradually and over time.”

Can Marital Challenges Escalate During Menopause?

 Taking a deeper dive, let us take a look at the challenges menopause can pose in a relationship. “Menopausal symptoms can contribute to the escalation of marital stress that is already present from additional midlife transitions (ageing parents, work-related stress, financial obligations and/or children leaving home). Due to this layering of menopausal symptoms with multiple midlife stressors and the accompanying emotions associated with them, everyday conflicts may appear to be insurmountable challenges to both partners,” shares the expert.

Mr Giriprasad continues, “The woman may feel as though her feelings were dismissed or invalidated, while the male partner may be confused and unable to assist her as a result of the rapid changes in her body. If neither of the partners is able to openly communicate and discuss the changes occurring in their respective lives, the build-up of frustration may lead to the development of an emotional distance between the partners, which has come to be known as ‘menodivorce’ in modern vernacular.”

Tips To Keep Emotions In Control During Menopause

On this note, Mr Giriprasad jots down hacks to keep your mood swings in check during menopause:

• Tackling your emotions during the menopausal transition includes both medical treatment and lifestyle modifications.
• It really helps if the person is regularly exercising or doing some physical activity that increases serotonin production and reduces anxiety.
• Having a balanced diet that includes adequate protein, healthy fats and complex carbohydrates aids to stabilise energy levels and improve moods.
• Proper sleep is crucial as well. Because without sleep, the emotional state gets disturbed. Mindfulness techniques (such as yoga, journaling, breath work) guide women towards a better emotional space.

How Can Men Support Their Menopausal Partners?

Support begins with understanding. Shedding more light on this, the expert shares, “Men should educate themselves about menopause instead of dismissing symptoms as ‘just mood swings’. Listening without trying to fix everything, validating feelings, and being patient during emotional moments can strengthen trust. Helping with daily tasks, checking in emotionally, and maintaining physical affection in non-sexual ways also reassure the partner that she is not going through this alone.”

So, how can couples navigate menopause together? “It is not a woman's burden to carry it alone. In fact, it is a stage where the couple should be handling things together. Communicating openly about the bodily and emotional changes between partners can really help in avoiding misconceptions, irritation, and wrong accusations. Attending medical check-ups together, then adjusting the state of intimacy to the change of comfort levels, and deciding to make time for each other — even if it's just a few minutes – can really bring about a great difference. A relationship, which is a source of support and cooperation during menopause, usually becomes more solid instead of being weakened,” concludes Mr Giriprasad.

The Final Word

Menodivorce is a trend where women opt for divorce during menopause. This is because women’s bodies go through some major hormonal changes during this time. If these changes are not recognised and accepted, partners may see them as a kind of emotional disengagement and even a lack of love in the relationship. Thus, it is important for couples to navigate this time with sensitivity and patience.