Mental Health & Sexual Health are two important aspects of overall human health that remain heavily stigmatised- but there’s more in common between them than just the commonplace neglect.
When it comes to these specific areas of wellbeing the word ‘holistic’ must be used- to signify that unlike other areas of health that are a sole outcome of one body organ or organ system- these two areas are affected by multiple processes going on in the body- often at the same time. In this article, Artika Singh - Public Health & Gender Anthropologist, Comprehensive Sexuality Educator, Founder, Taarini Foundation debunks some myths related to mental and sexual health.
Long-term researches in the field of mental health and sexual health have made it impossible to deny the connection between the two and the way in which they influence each other- but even so many myths continue to persist in ways that become barriers to those trying access solutions and healthcare interventions for their concerns and symptoms. I want to highlight some of these myths.
Myth #1: Having a sexual health problem means that something is wrong with your genitals
According to Artika Singh, “For most of us our understanding of sexual health continues to remain limited to an extent where we feel that a sex related problem could only mean damage in our genitals or the reproductive system.”
While physical factors are definitely a cause for some concerns, existing relationships with sex & sexuality and any existing mental health concerns are also leading causes of many sexual dysfunctions. For eg: as per some sources 20% of Erectile Dysfunction and 90% of all Vaginismus cases occur due to psychological causes.
Also Read: Do Not Ignore Pain During Sexual Activity, It Could Be Vaginismus Sexual Dysfunction
Safe to say that mental and sexual health work in a closed feedback loop mechanism- where both influence each other- for the good and the bad.
Tip from Artika: Improving your mental health and working towards coming to terms with any negative feelings is a slow and ongoing process. Doing so can guarantee improvement in not just the state of mind but also other areas of health like sexual health, gut health and others. Alternatively, if you are dealing with any form of sex concerns- pain, erection issues, performance issues or others- it’s worthwhile to consult with a sexual health counsellor to deep dive and identify any mental health concerns that may need attention.
Myth #2: “It will go away if you don’t think about it- it’s all in your head”
Very often, young adults are advised not to overthink pain, fear or anxiety surrounding sex because “it’s all in their head”. Well yes, it is all in their head- but it’s not a delusion- it simply means that many of these reactions stem from how people are feeling emotionally and mentally.
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Artika explains, “Emotions of fear and anxiety regarding sex can manifest as physical outcomes like pain, inability to feel arousal and/or orgasm and even a complete refusal to have sex. Many times these emotions could be remnants or reminders of past physical & emotional trauma that prevents you from physically engaging in sex in the present.”
Unfortunately, “not thinking about it” does not solve any problems.
Tip from Artika: It is important to acknowledge that however a person is feeling is valid and should be taken into account seriously by a health practitioner as that will become the basis of treatment for future. Sex should be pleasurable and not feel like a forced task- for that to happen we may need to look beyond our physical body towards our mind and emotions.
Also Read: Overthinking Is Sabotaging Your Mental Health, Here’s What You Can Do About It
Myth #3: If you have a mental health concern, you can’t have a good relationship or sex life.
The lack of knowledge about management of mental and sexual health casts a shadow of doubt on the possibility of a healthy sex life and mental health concerns co-existing. The fact is that all relationships require work and cooperation and the case is no different if one or more of the partners are also individually experiencing mental health concerns- It is still possible to have and sustain a healthy relationship.
Tip from Artika: Honest and open communication is an important aspect of any healthy relationship. If any partner(s) are having not-so-great mental health days, communication can be an excellent way to exchange thoughts and feelings, draw boundaries, practice empathy and grounding and understand how you can support one another in the relationship and otherwise- sometimes even heal through the process. A mental health concern is not necessarily a reason to run out of a relationship- but ultimately you should decide whether to stay or not or how involved to be based on your own emotional needs and bandwidth as well.