Your best friend has just announced her pregnancy and you are jealous. You hate to admit the fact that you have turned a cold shoulder to her complaints on the protruding belly and morning sickness. Nothing is more frustrating when having unsuccessful tries to get pregnant for so long, your friend just shows up with a baby bump! If you are finding it hard to come to terms with the news of your friend’s pregnancy, you surely need some help to deal with it.
Understand that it’s important to her: Your pregnant friend doesn’t talk about her pregnancy to tease you, instead she wants her loved ones to be present around her and support her in the most significant phase of her life. If you have decided to distance yourself from her, let us tell you that you are ‘betraying' your friend. The friendship which both of you share has much more importance than the pangs of jealousy. Motherhood is a blessing and being close to your friend, you should celebrate the fact that she has been blessed without much difficulty.
Understand your Fertility Issues: Instead of venting your frustration on your pregnant friend, try to assess the causes that are delaying your pregnancy. Talk to an obstetrician and get yourself thoroughly checked for any fertility related issues. If you keep stressing on questions such as ’why not me and why her?’ then you are openly inviting grief, sadness and anger.
Ask your friend to discuss other things: If pregnancy related talks disturb you emotionally , make it a point that your friend knows about it. Or find a way to talk about anything but pregnancy. Being honest about your feelings is easier than being secretive about it. Confide in Someone: The idea of confiding in the friend who is thrilled with her pregnancy news is certainly a bad idea Confide in someone close. It may be your sister or another close friend. If you hold your cards close to your chest for long, jealousy may fester.
Avoid the Baby Shower: To avoid being surrounded with your mom-to-be friend and other mommy friends, it is better to decline the invitation to baby shower. But, inform your friend in advance. You may frame it like 'I’m happy for you and your family, but hearing you discussing about pregnancy is extremely painful for me as I can’t conceive. Hope you will understand my situation and excuse me from not attending your baby shower.
Being jealous of a friend who is expecting is quite natural if you are facing troubles conceiving. However, you have to be careful that your resentment to not to be around your friend during her pregnancy won’t stir up a hornet’s nest in your friendship.
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