Owing to the colossal amount of stress that we are at the receiving end of on a daily basis, we tend to run at the first sign of trouble when it comes to relationships. Like every other aspect of life, a relationship can be stressful. It can cause pain, tension, strife and in some extreme cases, an eventual parting of ways. However, we need to try and reduce stress in a relationship before finally throwing in the towel.
Relationship stress can be dealt with effectively, if both parties involved adopt a positive outlook towards conflict management.
The first step in reducing stress in a relationship is to analyse your position in the most objective manner. You need to look at what is going wrong in the relationship. Remember, both of you are partners. Therefore, the blame and the responsibility lie with the two of you.
Healthy listening habits can reduce relationship stress. Listen to your partner. You might think that you are right, but your partner is also entitled to table her/his point of view. Listening also increases the level of confidence that your partner has in you. It is the ground rule for building trust.
Most people tend to close in, in case of an impending fight. In fact they even give in to their partner’s point of view just so that they can escape tension. Such negativity will only add to the already existing stress in your relationship. Your partner will one day see through your bluff. Therefore, you need to talk it out. And be prepared. Sometimes arguments can get heated. It is part of the healing process. Let your thoughts out. Never shut in on a conversation thinking it will sort itself out.
Do not wait for your partner to begin conflict resolution that will reduce stress in the relationship. Instead be proactive and take steps yourself. There is no point in mulling over what has gone wrong and how your partner is at fault. If you really want your relationship to work, then works towards bettering it. Effective communication will not reap benefits but it will also instil a sense of belief in the two of you.
It is very easy to point fingers at each other. However, that will only add to the relationship stress. In case, you strongly believe that your partner is to be blamed, then you need to table your point of view with mild assertion and subtlety. Do not scream, cry or shout. It will only make your partner run away from the discussion.
We are not advising you to break up. All that is being said is that distance between two warring people can help reduce stress in the relationship. Go out with your friends, pamper yourself, or you can also find a quiet spot and enjoy a cuppa with a good book. Encourage your partner to do the same. The time that you spend away from each other will help you understand what is going wrong in the relationship. You will also be able to broach the subject with a renewed vigour and perspective.
This is a very crucial step in trying to reduce stress in a relationship. If the two of you mutually believe that all else has failed, then you can seek advice from a third person. This person can be a mutual friend, or a certified couple’s counsellor. However, do not jump your partner’s bones by taking this step singlehandedly. It will only worsen the stress in the relationship.
What we have laid in front of you are only guidelines to dealing with stress in a relationship. You have to realise that every relationship is unique. Try your best not to judge your relationship based on other examples. Work and find your own unique solution.
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