Raise emotional quotient

By  , Jagran Cityplus
Jul 28, 2010

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Do you find yourself venting your anger and frustration on your child? Do you wish sometimes that your child should behave in a more acceptable way?


A simple answer to all these queries is to develop EQ (Emotional Quotient)/EI (Emotional Intelligence). In today's chaotic world, it is becoming difficult for a parent to provide for all the needs of their children, especially their emotional needs. Parents also carry stress when they are in contact with children. This adds to problems the child might be facing emotionally.


One of the key challenges faced by the parents is to bring up their children as conscientious, self-aware, empathetic, self-confident, contented and victorious human beings. Researches over the years have proved that "emotional intelligence" is a significant standpoint to achieve these challenges.


Why are emotions so important?


Emotions serve many purposes in our life apart from making our life interesting, namely, preparing individuals for action, shaping individuals' future behaviour and helping them to interact more effectively with others.


So then what is EQ/EI?


And how does it help in leading a happy, successful life? In simple words EI is the ability to monitor ones own and others thinking and actions. It is about using our intelligence of emotions in a positive way as a source of information, motivation and forming connections.
Developing EI in children helps children to manage relationships effectively and motivates them to do better in life. Children with high EI are more successful and popular at their workplace as compared to those with low EI. Developing EQ in children helps increase academic success, bolsters stronger friendship and reduces risky behaviours. It raises personal and social competencies, school attendance and satisfaction. It can decrease anti-social behaviour and aggression and discipline problems.


There are several factors such as self-awareness, empathy, emotional stability and many more which will help children to be emotionally healthy and stable.


Parent needs to give children a healthy emotional climate to enhance their EQ


Pointers to develop EI in children:-

  • Label emotions :- Give name to the emotion that the child is feeling so that the child understands his / her own feelings.
  • Expressing emotions positively :- Help the child to learn to express himself or herself positively. Tell the child what is the right and acceptable way to express oneself.
  • Avoid ignoring negative emotions :- Do not ignore negative emotions. Accepting negative emotions helps in dealing with them better and leads to healthy emotional development.
  • Develop empathy :- Make the child aware of his/her own feelings and also those of people around them.
  • Listening skills :- Help children develop listening skills.
  • Motivate children :- Use star/smiley charts, goal charts etc.
  • Develop values in children :- This can be done through stories and books.
  • Listen to your children :- Give children time to talk, have conversations with them. Be attentive and listen to what they have to say.
  • Understanding underlying emotions :- Try and understand the underlying emotions that the child is feeling and accept the same.
  • Be a good role model :- Children learn mostly through imitation.


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