7 Things Happy People Never do
What NOT to do When You Want to be Happy
When we seek something, we tend to focus on things we should do and ignore the things that might be keeping us from achieving it. The same rule applies to happiness too. If you want to be happy, you should not just embrace the habits that bring in happiness, you must also avoid doing things that keep you away from it. Happy people tend to steer away a lot of habits in order to sustain and rejoice in their lives. You might want to know them; so, read on.
Don’t Blame Other People for Your Problems
Happy people take responsibility when things go wrong. They do it even when the problems are largely someone else’s responsibility. This might seem unreasonable because taking duty for problems can cause feelings of shame, guilt, and inadequacy. But, something that we don’t realise is that blaming others is even more likely to lead to unhappiness, because it inhibits you psychologically. Be accountable for your problems, and then solve them responsibly.
Don’t Overreact to a Moment
“This is horrible” or “My life is ruined” are the common reactions of unhappy people when they encounter something bad in life. They overreact to even the slightest run-of-the-mill unpleasant moment. Happy people remember that bad times usually fade away over time and that’s why they are so much more blissful. They don’t let an unhappy moment to snowball into a long-term blench. Next time, life gives you problems, encourage your mind to consider a time when you will have moved past the problem.
Don’t Use Unparliamentary Language
Happy people don’t censure themselves or insult other people, either personally or publicly, not even in their mind. Using foul language is a sign of insecurity. Happy people aren’t insecure and hence, they don’t need to speak unparliamentarily of someone or themselves. Whenever you find yourself using such a language, mentally rewrite the story you're telling. Make it about how you have evolved past this problem or challenge, learned a valuable lesson or otherwise improved.
Don’t Feel Trapped
Happy people focus on the options that remain, even when inevitable factors hugely limit the paths open to them. That keeps them from feeling like helpless victims, a common source of unhappiness. Whenever you feel trapped by considerations, ask yourself a better way to manage the situation.
Don’t Carry Baggage
Being conscious of failures is a characteristic of unhappy people. Happy people don’t kick themselves endlessly for past mistakes. They do remember their missteps but only as times when they learned important lessons and not as tragedies to bemoan. Whenever a past failure comes to your mind, think about how you bounced back from it, what you learned from it or what from of that experience you apply to the present situation.
Don’t Spend Much Time around Unhappy People
People with aggressively negative thinking, chronically unhappy people can spread the unhappy virus and infect people around them too. Avoid being with unhappy people. If and when you must spend time among them, treat it as a learning opportunity. Try to discover what makes these cheerless people so unhappy, and then see if you can identify and manage similar trends in yourself.
When happy people are told something in confidence, they keep it as what it is- a secret. If they have to criticize someone, they either say it directly to that person or don't say it at all—they don't quetch to a third party. If you feel the impulse to talk about someone behind his/her back, instead use that time to improve your own life. If someone has wronged you, and you want to gossip about him/her, consider whether discussing the fundamental issues directly with this individual would lead to a more positive result. If so, do that. If not, drop the subject.
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