The question of morality is thick in the debate of infidelity and a one night stand. While the prior is long term intimacy with someone outside your marriage/relationship, the latter is a relatively lesser of the two evils, as it is only a ‘one night thing’, though just a night of fun puts the tag of infidelity on you automatically. The difference between the two is based on your idea of morality and faithlessness; you can in fact be an angel by opting for the lesser evil. Or so you think.
[Read: Long term or One Night Stand?]
One night stand may be defined as a single or one-off sexual intercourse which happens only once and the people involved probably never met again. If your partner goes out to enjoy the night with friends and develops sexual intimacy with a stranger, it is the example of a one night stand. Infidelity as you know is your partner’s long term sexual or romantic affair with someone other than you.
Let us not forget that both these cases involve a breach of trust, broken promises and vows, and an attempt to throw oneself in the arms of recklessness. Whether you sleep with your illegitimate lover regularly, or you have a one night stand, breach of trust once has already made you a monster in the eyes of your spouse. Therefore, it is not exactly fine even if it is one time sex with someone outside your wedlock/relationship. We are talking of this assuming that you are in a relationship or are married, if you are single then there is no question of infidelity and no one cares about your one night stands. If you are in a relationship or are married then a one night stand makes you infidel automatically.
The real question is not about society or any third party knowing or finding out about it, it is a matter of trust. The only person you should be worrying about is your spouse who is probably planning a bash for the next wedding anniversary. Ask yourself if you can bring your infidel self to smile and lay a kiss on her while looking at her eyes intently.
The greatest question that should strike your mind is why to be an infidel, to which the reasons can be many. The Journal of Marriage and Family mentions that these everyday accounts of extra marital infidelity (we are also talking about relationships outside marriage) do often stress on irrational accounts of alcohol impaired judgement or plain and simple sexual addiction. It is also mentioned there that while cultural scripts focus on romance and passion as the possible causes, people actually contemplate infidelity as a considered decision. This self conscious evaluation of extramarital options has been called ‘thinking’, or also ‘the debate’. A review of clinical and research studies identifies 31 reasons for extramarital relations. Most, falling under the categories of sex, emotional intimacy, love, and ego bolstering, pertain to personal gratification. Often we find that a partner who learns about his or her better half’s infidel ways, they themselves get to infidelity thus making a vicious circle. The causes that you actually think to be a natural happening are actually the result of many contributing factors.
One night stand is also a part of being infidel, so the same would apply for this, though the inability to continue a relationship with the concerned one night stand mate can be a result of your conscience, or your utter disregard for any form of relationship. This in fact makes your position even worse, thus we will have to conclude saying that a one night stand actually shows you in a worse light when compared with a long infidel relationship.
There is a flipside to this whole debate, and that is to say how infidelity could in fact be better than one night stand. You see, while one night stand is a practically new concept that people haven’t warmed up to yet, infidelity has been happening for a long time now. One night stand is morally degrading; society goes on a cultural shock with the mention of free sex with a random person. To think of it, in comparison to one night stands, infidelity deals with love. For most infidels their present marriage or relationship set up may not be all that good for whatever reason and so they look for love elsewhere. There is at least the hint of love in such a relationship like Bollywood blockbuster, ‘Kabhie Alvida Na Kehna’. If your spouse/lover is having one night stands then the need is primarily for sex, it is sheer lust that is driving him or her out every night looking for a new sex partner. So, when compared, somehow you can comfort yourself with the fact that your spouse is only in need for love.
There is an exception when it comes to one night stands, a single person can involve himself or herself in one night stands and that will not be back stabbing anyone, but infidelity by its very nature is a wrong doing. The very word is complimented by the fact that you are either married or are in a relationship, thus making it possible for you to be infidel. Homes break apart, hearts are broken, relationships torn, and if it is a marriage then children is greatly affected too. Infidelity can get very bad. It is however true that even a case of one night stand if caught, can have the same effect on a relationship.
[Read: Truth Behind One Night Stands]
Infidelity is the end result of a one night stand if you are hitched or else no one really cares, but as we said, you may want to comfort yourself by going for the lesser evil. It’s a matter of ethics for a degraded human being, yes; we heard they have ethics too.
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