Every couple tying the nuptial knot wants to live 'happily ever after'. This may or may not happen when the marriage comes to get tested on the bedrock of reality. The picture is not so rosy when work, family, finance and personal issues come in the way. Is it possible to save a marriage from falling apart? How can it be made long-lasting? On the occasion of Valentine's Day, we talked to happily married couples from different walks of life to get their views on making a relationship last a lifetime.
One must understand that each person is unique and has a variety of emotions which should be respected. "It would be better if one understands the goals of the other partner and finds out what the other wants in life. That way one can build a strong foundation," says Sucheta, resident of Sahibabad, who works for a media house.
Generally, it is the human tendency to look for perfection but few realize that perfection is really hard to live upto because in reality nobody is perfect. "Women especially try to look for a man who has a good personality, good stature in life and is responsible. But at some point of time when the man fails to fulfil all these expectations and starts showing his real personality and behaviour patterns, she becomes disheartened and thinks he's not as strong as she perceived him to be. Instead of giving up on marriage, it would be better to act in a mature manner," says Narendra, who works for an NGO.
In a marriage one should always respect the feelings of the partner and stop being dominating. However much one is caught up with work and professional commitments, make sure to spend some time together like attending a public event, go to party, picnics or just hang around. "At the same time give your partner space in his/her life. Just as much as we need time together, we also need space to spend time with others as well. After getting married life doesn't end with the spouse only," says businesswoman Shibha.
"Speak out and express your love when you can and tell your spouse how important they are for you. This will bring liveliness in your personal life. When differences come up, instead of fighting develop the habit of listening to your partner's point of view. This may help iron out the differences in the course of time," says Mriluson, who has got married recently.
Time and circumstances changes so it's important to be flexible enough to adapt or get evolve as per the situation. And where you can't, its better to bring that in other partner's knowledge.
Always support your partner in his/her success, growth, achievement, and most importantly, failures. Wear a forgiving attitude as well. Sometimes get angry, feel hurt about something but as a human being one should be ready to be forgiving to bring happiness and stability in life. As they say, its about life partners.
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