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My best friend prefers her online friends over me

By  , Midday
Aug 15, 2012
4.8 / 5(4 Ratings)

Dear qpid,

One of my best friends (17), who I thought of as a potential girlfriend, has become obsessed with talking on G-chat! She's on it pretty much every night and usually talks to about 10 different people at the same time which hardly constitutes as a proper conversation with any of them! Thing is she seems obsessed with it and won't come out at night with us. When I call her, she has her phone next to the computer and still types while you are talking to her, and pays only half attention to what you are saying. This is  really affecting our friendship and I don't know what to do. Talking to her about it doesn't seem to have much effect as she doesn't accept that she has obsession/problem.

 

online friends over me

 

Navin
Dear Navin,
I would suggest you try talking to her again telling her how you feel. Make her understand that she is giving more attention to people online than the real friendships she has built  over the years. If it still doesn't make a difference to her, then you need to carry on with your life and other friends you have. Wait for her to realise this on her own as time goes by. People don't always see the problem when pointed out by others. Sometimes they only realise it by themselves. The thing is, with the internet we all go through stages where we are constantly online and just enjoy the whole thing but everything gets boring after a while, and I am sure your friend will get bored too. Just leave her alone for now.

I am in an affair with my married boss...

 

Dear qpid,
I am having an affair with my boss. I really like him and vice versa. I know he will never leave his wife, and am ok with that. But of-late I have started befriending her, so I have more access to him. She has no idea baout the affair. Am I wrong?

XXX
Dear Friend,
You know he won't marry you, so why are you with him? Why would you want to be in a relationship which has no future? I don't see this ending well. It would be bad enough if she finds out her husband is having an affair, worse for her that the "other" woman is someone she called a friend.

What do my secret fantasies mean?

Dear qpid,
I've been in a relationship with my girlfriend for the past 4 years. I really love her, and we are both certain that we are going to get married someday in the near future. My dilemma is that for the past couple of months, I've been falling for this other woman. I think she is wonderful, and have found myself fantasizing about her...constantly! What does this mean? I love my girlfriend, but seem to be obsessesed with my fantasies for this other woman. I know this won't translate into action from my side but what do my desires mean? I keep thinking about this other girl all the time.

ND
Dear ND,
Your desires mean you are a normal, healthy male. The fact that you have resisted them makes you an above-average, ethical and responsible adult. Well done! The temptation is not worth your future with your girlfriend. But she has a right to know that you are starting to develop feelings for someone else. Tell her that you want these feelings to go away, and then distance yourself from this other woman. You are thinking marriage so subconciously you might be worried about never being with another woman. You can try to spice up your sex life by doing it at different places, with different positions/sex toys. But don't let this other woman ruin what you have with your girlfriend or you will never forgive yourself.

 

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