How to Overcome Fear of Intimacy in a Relationship

By  ,  Onlymyhealth editorial team
Apr 01, 2013

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How to Overcome Fear of Intimacy in a Relationship

Fear of intimacy is often linked to past experiences. It can cause a major roadblock in your relationship, so make an extra effort to overcome fear of intimacy in your relationship.


Find Out the Cause


The very first step towards overcoming fear of intimacy is to figure out the cause behind it. People who are hurt in the past think that ‘closeness can hurt’ while the others avoid being intimate to someone due to fear of rejection or losing their self identity in a relationship. Question yourself and find out the cause of your fear.

Ones you have find out the root cause of your fear it is time to act. If you find that your past is bothering you, give yourself some time and constantly remind yourself that all people are not the same. Besides hurting yourself, involving in other relationship too early will also trouble your new partner. If you find that there is some problem in relationship or you are not comfortable with your date then tell him/her that you need some time.


Take Help


If you are not able to figure out what is keeping you away from becoming intimate with your partner then take help for your relationship. Talk about your problem to someone you trust on, it can be a family member or a close friend who knows you well.  You can even take professional help to overcome fear of intimacy in your relationship.

Spend Time Together

Spend time together i.e. just you and your partner. The whole idea is to spend quality time together and share your experiences. Tell your partner about yourself and avidly listen to what s/he says. By doing this you can surely add to the intimacy level shared between both of you.


Trust your Partner


If you really want to be with someone then it is important to completely trust that person. If your past experiences are coming in your way then remind yourself that your current partner is not the reason for them. Live in present and enjoy what life has brought to you.

In addition to this, you must respect your feelings, abilities and even emotional limitations. It is also important to trust yourself and know that the fear is because of some reason and you will overcome it.


Become Friends


Learn to take things in baby step. If feeling of close intimacy is making you anxious then try to be friends first. Make yourself comfortable and then slightly open up. If you face difficulty in sharing your feelings then you can even write down the things you want to share, this will help you to express them out to your partner.


Read more articles on Intimacy in Relationship.


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