Conceiving a child is a not just a major change in your life. Child birth will also impact your partner’s life as he will have added responsibilities. The child will play a major role in the dynamics of your relationship with your partners as a child demands full time attention and care. In the rigour of tending to your child, ensure that you don’t leave out your partner in this process of pre natal, natal and post natal care.
Being involved and communicating to him constantly that he is responsible for the family’s well being empowers a man’s self concept and helps him adjust with the changes of being a father.
Reasons why your partner isn't involved
Some reasons enlisted below could be possibilities of low involvement during pregnancy:
- Your partner is not prepared to undertake the responsibility of a baby.
- He is unsure if having a baby is a correct step depending on your financial and emotional stability.
- He probably doesn’t know how to get involved in the process.
- He is unsure if he is required as he may have developed insecurity about a baby taking all your time.
- He is probably too overburdened with responsibility to give you too much time or get involved in the pregnancy. He is probably looking at the best he can do to make you and your baby comfortable functionally and may be overlooking the emotional aspect. In this situation you need to understand that he cares for you and your child and is trying his best to provide you with everything. Talk to him openly about your emotional needs but don’t overburden him.
Ways in which you can involve your partner:
- Go to the doctor for ultrasound visits together, see the baby grow in your womb will make you feel happy and sentimental about your unborn child.
- Go for child birth counselling classes together.
- Go to a trainer for pregnancy exercises and tell him to be with you as the class ends.
- Go out for romantic dates together, the child will strengthen your bond and not ruin it.
- Read child care and parenting books together.
- Tell him to listen to the child kicking in your tummy. It will be an overwhelming moment for both of you.
- Keep a common journal where both you and your partner can write about your feelings about the baby. It will be a good memory post child birth and will be treasured for a lifetime.
- Host couple lunches and talk to couples who have babies, understand their dynamics.
- Remember taking care of the baby is a team effort and so is caring and nurturing the baby.
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