how to conquer sexual performance anxiety

By:Arka Roy Chowdhury, Onlymyhealth Editorial Team,Date:Apr 07, 2014

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Many people seem nervous when it comes to sexual performance, and there are many factors responsible for it. Here are ways to cope with your sexual performance anxiety.
  • 1

    Sexual Anxiety

    The art of lovemaking is the art of being at peace with oneself, yes it is that easy. People often tend to perform bad in the bedroom because they get anxious, because they do not know right from wrong and are constantly in a state of fear. In order to conquer sexual anxiety you first have to look at your partner and then realise that he or she is all yours. Now get lost in each others body. Here are ten ways to get past the initial anxiety.

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  • 2

    Communication

    Communication is the key to most problems and the more you communicate the better it is. By communicating with your partner you are letting him or her know about what is going on in your mind and in this way you and your partner can work on your worries. Whatever the fear and the cause for your anxiety may be it can be definitely be worked on, so please communicate.

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  • 3

    Erase Stress

    Most times anxiety can happen due to stress and you will do really well by erasing stress from your life. Stress in the form of work, family, relationships and the likes could all be reasons for your inability to perform. Stress can be a great factor which is bound to take a toll on your sexual performance. Therefore you should throw all your stress away and be at peace when in bed with your partner.

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  • 4

    Physical Health

    Do not rule out the possibility of a physical problem, whether you are a male or a female. Try to determine if there is any medical cause of the problem and do not rule out anything. Go get a check up done and this is especially true for those who experience pain during intercourse. Find out if it is a medical problem and then get treated for it.

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  • 5

    Enjoy Foreplay

    Foreplay is the best and there cannot be two ways about it. You do not jump at intercourse right from start, you have to build it up. The more foreplay you do the better your actual intercourse experience would be. You and your partner should make it a point to tease each other and indulge in foreplay to the fullest, if it is just a mental problem then by the end of it you will realise that you are finding it easier to have intercourse.

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  • 6

    Focus on Pleasure

    You are a human being with blood and flesh and you deserve pleasure. Therefore, when you are at it you should make sure that you are focusing on pleasure. Find out what sensations you really enjoy, which are your erogenous zones and how would you like your partner to love you. You should also love your partner back, it is a give and receive process. Have fun while you are at it and think only about the pleasure that you are experiencing.

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  • 7

    Get Comfortable Sexually

    It is very important that you get used to the idea of sex and try to calm down. May be the origins of your anxiety is rooted in the discomfort that you have with sex. If you can address this then you will do very well, and may as well get past this bad phase. Try and read more on sex and develop a liking for it, and over all try and understand your partner, look at your partner as a sexual being.

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  • 8

    Realistic Expectations

    It is very important indeed to have real life expectations from your partner and from yourself too. If you think that adult film sexual activity is how it really is in real life then you are wrong. Your anxiety can crop up from such expectations too, and you can only handle this by realising that neither you nor your partner is an adult film star. Let things unfold the normal way, keep it simple.

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  • 9

    Do not Think of Orgasm

    The problem with most men is that they worry too much about the woman getting an orgasm. While this is very thoughtful of them, it also happens to ruin things. You may get anxious thinking that you really want your woman to get an orgasm and beat your head thinking about it, and this will ruin things to a great extent. So, you must stay calm and let things unfold, orgasm will happen when it has to, just be sincere about it!

    Image Courtesy: gettyimages.in


  • 10

    Healthy Lifestyle

    Well, this is pretty much the same for everything. Doing exercises regularly and eating healthy diet is the best way to keep your sex life at its top. Also you must get enough sleep every night. All this will definitely contribute to a better mind and healthier body. You will know the difference when anxiety gets kicked out too soon.

    Image Courtesy: gettyimages.in


  • 11

    Approach a Psychologist

    Finally in order to understand the root of your anxiety it is very important for you to meet a psychologist. A specialist would know all regarding your sexual anxiety and will work with you on all your issues. You will go through talk therapy and will find that both you and your partner will be able to set aside all differences and get closer physically.

    Image Courtesy: gettyimages.in

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