7 Reasons why we envy our friends

By:Ariba Khaliq, Onlymyhealth Editorial Team,Date:Aug 01, 2015

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Envy is a simple fact of human nature and friendship. There can be many reasons to be envious of your friends, even the closest ones. Here are seven reasons why we envy our friends.
  • 1

    The top triggers of envy

    No matter how much you think you’re above it, you do feel envy from time to time. The basic desire: you want what you believe someone else has. When envy enters a friendship, tension and conflict arise. Friendship is built on trust and mutual support, so even the slightest presence of envy or competition gnaws its foundation. And, it becomes painfully difficult to trust a friend who doesn’t wish the best for you. That envious friend could be you too. Yes, even being in the most comfortable space, you could sometimes feel jealous of your friend and vice versa. But why, you ask. Take a look at the list of triggers.

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  • 2

    Money

    Money matters and it matters a lot. It can pollute friendship if one friend has plenty of money, while the other struggles day to day trying to meet ends meet. A difference in financial status affects friendships across all social circles.

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  • 3

    Relationship status

    If you’re looking for love and your close friend is in a romantic relationship, your friendship may go discrepant. And mind you, unlike popular belief, it is not just women who feel sad and bitter about a close friend always in the company of someone while they do not. Men are equally jealous of their committed bros.

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  • 4

    Fertility and Children

    Women in their 20s and 30s are super susceptible to jealousy provoked by fertility. If you’ve been unsuccessfully trying to get pregnant and your friend is expecting, you might not feel 100% happy for her. You love your friend, of course, but you love meeting your own needs more. If you can’t get pregnant, a tiny part of you would feel comforted if your friend couldn’t either.

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  • 5

    Physical attractiveness

    Young people often place large emphasis on physical attractiveness than they will later in life. If you’ve a low self-esteem, you may magnify your shortcomings in this area and envy attractive friends. They seem “lucky” to you because they can easily attract dates.

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  • 6

    Weight

    People who have struggled with weight have a damaged self-esteem. While some overweight people may not take the overload, others feel that it negatively affects their lives. Having a close friend who is thin can trigger envy in such people. They don’t think it’s fair and may drop examples of envy in everyday conversations.

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  • 7

    Success in career

    If a friend making more money wasn’t reason enough to be envious of him or her, having a friend in the same profession who is more successful can trigger serious grudges. If one friend is promoted and the other isn’t, the friendship hits a roadblock.

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  • 8

    Social media

    Admit it, we have all been there–being jealous of friends on Facebook who uploaded photos of themselves in their happiest moments. A study found that if Facebook users are envious of the activities and lifestyles of their friends, they are much more likely to report feelings of depression (Tandoc, Ferrucci, & Duffy, 2015).

    Image Source: Getty

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